4 years ago, I thought that being out of Japan for 5 years was way too long, but here I am, I have only a year left till finishing the college. As I grew up, I started sensing the speed of time; I reckon being an adult means being given more choices for my own life, which is constrained by time, so that we always have to care about time when we choose to do something. The more I want for my life, the less the time of my life seems to be.
Until so far, my decisions have been conditional on what my parents answer to them, and they were never turned down. I could always do whatever I chose and I could always try whatever I was interested in, because my parents would always allow me to do so. But the solution to my future is entirely dependent on what I decide, which I did know, but I have been pretending not to know.
When I decided to do my degree in UK (I decided to come to Ireland when I was studying in UK), my mum kept telling me to come back to Japan when I finish the college, but recently, she’s been telling me,
“I still want you back, but I now don’t know if it would be the best for you to come back here for good; by listening to your story in Ireland and seeing how you are over there makes me feel I have to stop you coming back. You would definitely get re-culture shocked again and I don’t wanna you to regret leaving there”
During the exam period, I went to London and had a long long long interview with a big Japanese company. I think they liked me a lot, but the company was not my first priority, and I was there just to get myself prepared for other interviews in near future; but the other applicants who were also chosen until the last stage were those who wanted to work for them and had themselves fully prepared for the interview. I felt my undetermined attitude was really rude to those who really wanted the job. I was taken to the dinner at night and could talk to many of the company’s staffs; I did enjoy being there and it was a great experience, but after that, I re-thought whether it was where I wanted to be in my future or not. I don’t think it was. This answer was really hard to face, as I thought that I would love to work for a big Japanese company and that would be the place for me to be, but by witnessing how it is really like, it made me re-think about my viewpoint toward job-choices. Of course it is very wrong to think all the Japanese companies are the same, but I was very shocked to know that there are some situations to which, before anything starts, I can tell that I could never get myself adjusted. I guess I was too confident in my adaptability to any environment.
Until so far, my decisions have been conditional on what my parents answer to them, and they were never turned down. I could always do whatever I chose and I could always try whatever I was interested in, because my parents would always allow me to do so. But the solution to my future is entirely dependent on what I decide, which I did know, but I have been pretending not to know.
When I decided to do my degree in UK (I decided to come to Ireland when I was studying in UK), my mum kept telling me to come back to Japan when I finish the college, but recently, she’s been telling me,
“I still want you back, but I now don’t know if it would be the best for you to come back here for good; by listening to your story in Ireland and seeing how you are over there makes me feel I have to stop you coming back. You would definitely get re-culture shocked again and I don’t wanna you to regret leaving there”
During the exam period, I went to London and had a long long long interview with a big Japanese company. I think they liked me a lot, but the company was not my first priority, and I was there just to get myself prepared for other interviews in near future; but the other applicants who were also chosen until the last stage were those who wanted to work for them and had themselves fully prepared for the interview. I felt my undetermined attitude was really rude to those who really wanted the job. I was taken to the dinner at night and could talk to many of the company’s staffs; I did enjoy being there and it was a great experience, but after that, I re-thought whether it was where I wanted to be in my future or not. I don’t think it was. This answer was really hard to face, as I thought that I would love to work for a big Japanese company and that would be the place for me to be, but by witnessing how it is really like, it made me re-think about my viewpoint toward job-choices. Of course it is very wrong to think all the Japanese companies are the same, but I was very shocked to know that there are some situations to which, before anything starts, I can tell that I could never get myself adjusted. I guess I was too confident in my adaptability to any environment.
Also, I’ve realized that I would want to work for a company who can value what I’m studying in the college rather than where I go to study. It is true that Japanese companies tend to care about the fame of universities rather than the context of experience as a student unless we are science students. To a great extent, I knew they were like that, but facing this reality was harder than I expected. I like studying Economics and for my future, I would like to take advantage of what I have learnt in the university not just from the social life but also from the academic aspect. I would like the society to value what I have achieved as a student. I guess this is just an ideal state and I know everything can’t go in the way I want it to be, but at least I definitely want to find the best solution to my future. I want to figure out what I really want for my future, and I want to find a place where I can see myself being happy and smiling all the time.
Anyway, this is what I have been thinking.....
Anyway, this is what I have been thinking.....
I had a great time in Dublin after the exam for a week, and went to London. I was Rondonning with my favourite people over there. It was super cool to catch up with them and it was great just to chill without worrying anything.
I loved the weather too. I came back to Japan a few days ago. It's always great to be back home but the weather sucks. I don't like Japanese summer in terms of the weather as it is too humid, which makes the heat worse. It feels like the air is really heavy,,, Apart from the weather things are great though. I stayed at my best friend, Ayaka's apartment in Kobe on the first night. I love my monkey Ayaka! And then I came back to Hiroshima. I haven't done much, just have been hunging out with my mum, which is though really cool. The food is wonderful! Many of my friends gave me a call and I cannot wait to see them soon! I will be in Tokyo from the next week for job-hunting! But I am also planning to enjoy myself there too!
My mum is correcting my weird Japanese... hmmm,,, My English will be totally messed up after the summer I guess,,,Ah well!
Kx
2 comments:
As an experienced... ok, I'm over reacting again... Let me start like this. If you want to succeed in your life in terms of attaining financial freedom, you've gonna have to put much more effort than just finding a very good paid job. What makes the difference, IMHO, between big fishes and small ones is the thriving, the natural thirst for more. The big fish will always have something under the sleeve, and each solution will have a backup solution, so basically it never stops. You've always gotta have a goal and extremely stubborn attitude in order to achieve what you are doing. I don't have a degree in economics but it seems very logical to me that more sources of income you get, more financially independent you become. So, are you the big fish? :)
About your english... if you wish, we can exchange emails, and you can stay on the same level. If you wish we can also switch to "advanced" mode with a wee bit more sophisticated vocabulary, what do you say... :D After all, it seems I might become 英語先生 <-- how did this happen??!!
thanks for the mg! I've never checked it out, I'll try to find what is suitable to my future first but I'll decide where I want to settle first of all. I now ain't sure if I want to come back to Japan for good. Will see! I guess I can keep speaking English with my non-Japanese friends, so I don't think I need to be taught but thanks for your offer;)
Hope all is well! kx
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